Today, thanks to smartphones and advanced technologies, people are essentially connected 24/7 to each other via phone, text, email and social media. In light of this, smartphone addiction is a growing problem. Some people can get to a point where they feel they cannot survive without their smartphone.
Have you ever accidently broken your smartphone and felt “cut-off” until you were able to get a replacement? Worse still is the need to be connected to social media at all times. This can become so severe that a person can start to tune out those around them. They would rather be on their phone texting, instant messaging, or using various apps than interacting directly.
For married people, this type of addiction is just as serious as addictions to drugs and alcohol and could result in a divorce. Before things get serious enough to destroy your relationship, it is important to determine how severe the addiction is and the extent to which it is affecting your marriage.
Do you have to wait on your spouse to get off their phone to spend time together or converse? Some spouses get so wrapped up in their smartphones that they actually stop carrying on verbal conversations with their husbands or wives. Instead, they resort to text messaging to discuss matters, ask questions, and arrange schedules. This can lead to arguments because emotions, voice inflections, and interpersonal interactions are lost.
Do you notice your spouse has to constantly be on a certain app whether you are around or not? Your attention becomes very much a secondary element. This is often a precursor to a developing smartphone addiction. For instance, your spouse is constantly checking his/her Facebook status while waiting for dinner to be ready, during commercial breaks in programs, or whenever there is any opportunity, instead of spending time with you.
Do you feel like you are alone because your spouse is ignoring your needs? Some people actually get depressed and experience feelings of abandonment due to their spouse’s smartphone addiction. They could be sitting right across from you at the dinner table, but their head is stuck in their phone, leaving you wondering what is wrong with you and why your spouse is no longer interested in you.
Does your spouse respond to alerts on their phone while he/she is engaged in intimate and even sexual activities with you? You might initially think this is funny, but for some people, they have lived this experience firsthand. For example, they are in the middle of a romantic or stimulating sexual activity, their spouse’s phone rings, and they reach for the phone to take a call or respond to a text message. The romance is completely lost.
If you answered “yes” to one or more of the above situations, the first thing you need to do is sit down with your spouse and create a list of house-rules” regarding smartphone use. Set limitations on where and when phones are allowed including:
- No phones at the dinner table.
- When dining out or socializing with friends/family, phones are put away.
- Text messaging is not used to discuss family, personal, or important matters.
- Phones are left in another room while watching TV or spending time together.
By establishing a set of rules and sticking to them, you could potentially save your marriage and make your spouse more aware of their smartphone addiction. However, if your efforts fail, it might be time to take consider filing for separation and divorce. Contact Davies Law Firm today at 613-688-0462 for more information and to arrange a consultation appointment.